Baby Question......

On my way home from taking Colton to his swimming lesson, he asked, "Mom, can we pretend I have a baby brother and sister"....... This question has come up before, and I usually seem to "ignore" it, but for some reason it hit me hard. Colton has never had that "real family life", and I don't want him to grow up resenting me for it. Would I love to start over..........yes and no.......... Am I scared........definietly. If I do do it again, I want it to be "forever". I mean don't get me wrong, I love my son, I love that I have been his rock and raised him for the past 5+ years, and I wouldn't change being his "only parent" for the world. But sometimes the guilt gets to me. Maybe I am just having an emotional, depressing day.

First Week of Kindergarten.........

Well we made it thru the first week of Kindergarten, or should I say, I made it thru the first week of school.... I had a great experience being able to take time off work this week to take Colton to school & be there every day to pick him up when the bell rang at 3:40. I have never been the type of person who has wanted to be a stay at home mom:

• Being a single mom for over 5 years
• Having to pick up the pieces when I was married, so we would have the funds
• Liking my "Independence", or not wanting someone else to rely on

But all my views on that have changed. I now feel jealous for all the mom's who are able to be there when there children come out of school. I feel like Colton & I bonded even more this week because I was "always there". I guess what I am saying is, for the stay at home mom's out there, always appreciate the time you have with your child, because us mom's that have to work........would give anything to have that time!!!

First Day of Kindergarten

Colton started Kindergarten on Monday. I knew this day was coming, however, the night before I dreaded the fact my little boy was going to the "BIG SCHOOL". As I put Colton to bed the night before, I read him my favorite book, "Love You Forever". As I read the book, it took everything I had not to start crying. But luckily I got threw it, and off to bed we went. The morning came and it went off to a great start. Woke him up, made him breakfast, got him ready, then off to school we went. I wasn't sure who was more nervous, Colton or I. The school was amazing. There were balloons up, music playing, and a lot of smiling teachers out. After a ton of pictures (other moms had my same idea) we finally entered the classroom. The teacher called over all the kids to read, "Twas the night before Kindergarten". Then it was time to say our goodbyes. As I fought back my tears, I noticed my little guy looked sad. I asked him what was wrong, and he said.........."I don't have any friends". Any mom knows that after hearing that, your heart melts, your stomach turns, and all you want to do is cry with him. But I comforted him & reassured him that everything will be ok, and you will make new friends. After leaving the school I cried and that was probably the hardest thing I have had to do so far. I didn't get much work done that day, I just watched the clock and wanted it to be 3pm. I was waiting there when school let out and was so excited to hug all over him. He said the day was good and that he liked his teacher. YIPPEE!!!! Getting thru the first day was very draining to me, but I know that as the days go by, it will become a lot easier for me to see my baby grow up......

Meeting the Teacher

Last night Colton & I went to meet his Kindergarten teacher. It was so cute to walk into a little "kids" classroom & see how everything was put together. The teacher was amazing, she was so nice & came up to us and showed Colton his new table "desk" and had Colton find his name or seat. She had a little gift bag waiting for him which he got so excited to see. Colton lasted about 5 minutes while the teacher was talking to us, he was more interested in walking around the classroom & exploring. While I watched Colton explore the classroom, my heart/body filled up with butterflies as well as excitement to see him. I wasn't sure if Colton would be nervous, but he showed me how independent he truely is. Later that night on the drive home, Colton asked me "when is it going to be tomorrow"? I said, "well after you go to sleep tonight & wake up, it will be tomorrow, why"? He said, "will I go back to Kindergarten tomorrow"? Now I know that I won't have to worry about him going to school, I am more nervous for myself. My little guy is growing up, time to let go of my baby & I am not ready for that!!!!

Where have all the years gone?

My son Colton will be starting Kindergarten on Monday, August 10th. With that being said, I have to question myself....Where have all the years gone? It was like it was yesterday that I found out I was pregnant......only to be 9 months later I gave birth to such a beautiful, precious gift from my Heavenly Father...... and now he will be taking the next step & going to school. I am so thankful for the past 5 and 1/2 years with Colton, he has been my rock through many trying times. He has grown up to be a big boy, very active in sports, very loving (sometimes sassy) little guy. I have a lot of emotions with him growing up so fast, I want to turn back the hands of time & keep him as my little baby. No matter where the time goes, he will always be my baby!!!

Getting Started!!

So I have debating for a while on weither or not I was going to start blogging.......and I decided it was time. I am really bad about journaling, keeping friends posted on certain events, and sometimes with the joys of being a mom, I am so forgetful. I figured that this will be a better way to keep everyone updated!!

Welcome to my blog!!!!